- Categories: After Curry
Third year Curry YSI student and Teachers in the Movement researcher Annie Weinberg discusses education, history, and memorialization. Check out her blog post.
When you attend to and acknowledge your child for their efforts and accomplishments, your child will feel good about him or herself because you are focusing on their strengths. Using praise improves relationships between adults and children and increases children’s self-esteem. There are effective ways to this, and based on the psychological effects of how praise is received by children, here are 3 tips on the best ways to praise your child:
1) Be specific
Praise works best when you specifically describe the thing for which your child is being acknowledged. For example, it’s better to say “Great job – you worked hard picking up the toys!” than saying “Great job!”
It is best to praise children by focusing on the behavior rather than the person. For example, saying “I’m proud of you for tasting those carrots” puts the emphasis on the behavior (tasting a new food) whereas saying “you are a good girl for tasting those carrots” puts the emphasis on the child (being a good person). This may seem subtle, but we do not want children to think they are “good” or “bad” because of the behavior they display. We do want children to know what behaviors we expect from them and praising their positive actions accomplishes that. READ THE REMAINDER OF THIS POST ON THE PLEASE AND CARROTS BLOG
Participating in the Curry School Mentor Teacher Training Program began a reflective process for me during the last four months. I mentored two graduate students prior to the class and felt the partnership went well. I knew I did not want new student teachers to feel as lost as I did when I first started teaching and I thought this class could help guide me as a coach and mentor.
The class taught me a lot about myself, and the kind of teacher I want to be for my students and teacher candidates. My colleagues and I discussed various strategies for school transformation through coaching. We read work by Elena Aguilar in which she states that those of us who facilitate professional growth must “cultivate a particular way of being”. This means we must practice to convey a sense of calm and reflective space that is open and allows our practicum students and teacher interns to slow down and learn. To do so, we must be confident, compassionate, grounded, and present.
Teachers and coaches are ask to do many things each day and fulfill many roles. These skills must come with confidence and compassion. I notice that teacher candidates are excited to learn and experience everything. The mentor teacher training taught me to narrow my focus and discuss key dimensions of teaching to help teacher candidates grow. An example would be looking at the dimension of Positive Climate. By looking at one dimension, we enable future teachers to learn and focus. We then can ask probing questions to identify key understanding and to facilitate genuine problem solving.
I work with students with disabilities and when we focus on too many things at one time, my students can become overwhelmed trying to process too much information. Yet, when we introduce one item at a time and build upon that foundation, the outcome seems so much easier to achieve. Just like my students, teacher candidates need to focus on one or two components of teaching at a time. We need to be grounded and present as we help our teacher candidates focus on specific teaching practices to build relationships, problem solve, and enable themselves to learn more deeply.
Watching and listening are skills that most resonate with me every time I am with a student, a colleague, and especially a teacher candidate. I wait, I listen, I pause, and I make my brain turn off everything else that is going on so I can be present when someone is talking. This is a life lesson for all teachers.
My daughter, a freshman in high school, said to me, “mom I cannot hear what the teacher is saying when I am trying to take notes.” She did not mean she could not physically hear the words the teacher was saying. She meant my brain is working so hard to take notes, I am missing all this other important information that makes what I am writing down make sense. We all need to be present in the task we are trying to accomplish whether we are the student, the teacher, or the mentor. I know this is the best action I can take for a person is to be present and as a “way of being” when mentoring others. As Elena Aguilar said, we must be confident, compassionate, grounded, and present. This is what I aspire to be each day.
In this 4th installment of this blog series, we share contributions by alumni of the Curry School’s Mentor Teacher Training Program, funded by a grant through the Virginia Department of Education. The Curry School partners with local school divisions to deliver a graduate course at no cost to their highly recommended teachers. The course focuses on ambitious, evidence-based coaching and mentoring practices that facilitate high-quality teaching practice. While enrolled in the course, these mentors refine their practices while developing the skills of future teachers’ in their classrooms. In this post, mentor Karen Purnell shares her perspectives about the course and about the importance of facilitating trust.
For your reference, this link is the first in this Ambitious Instruction Blog: http://blog.curry.virginia.edu/2016/06/14/ambitious-instruction-teacher-preparation-at-curry/
In our spring course for mentor teachers, we wrestled with the idea of coaching and mentoring as ways of being. But how do we facilitate pre-service teachers’ evolving ways of being professional educators? What does it mean for our own ways of being mentors? These are difficult questions. Yet these are questions that I have been pondering throughout this course. A fundamental component in this process is building trust. This is key for transformational coaching: our goal is to facilitate transformation from pre-service to competent, independent professional.
To build trust, it is important to be a good listener. Upon reflection, I find that I am an impatient listener. As a natural born problem solver, I want to solve the problem and be done with it. Transformational coaching changes a person’s way of being. And to do that, the teacher needs to learn to be reflective of their practice. A mentor teacher should facilitate this through empathic listening. Professor Pam Tucker visited our class to engage us in an activity on empathic listening as teacher-leadership. It was very difficult at first to participate in the activity. As she prompted us to seek first to understand, diagnose before prescribing, and to avoid projecting our own home movies onto other people’s behaviors, she reminded us that the greatest need we all have is psychological survival and safety.
I really want to prescribe before I diagnose! It is so easy to give advice based on our own experiences. What I am learning, is that my experience is not the same as others, and frankly when another teacher is in the throes of a crisis, they do not want to hear about my experiences. They need someone to validate their experience and to empower them to respond meaningfully. To truly enact transformational change, it is important that we begin to recognize ways within ourselves to change.
Setting the example for pre-service teachers by building a culture of trust and reflection can help to develop these relations with students and increase student engagement. Teaching is not so much about doing, but about being. It is about being benevolent, honest, open, reliable and competent, to paraphrase Tschannen-Moran. These are the ways in which we build relations with not only other teachers, but also with our students. We explore language, nonverbal communication, and emotions, and how these affect relationships, performance and results.
Reflecting upon my leadership practice, I am learning to not be the number one problem solver. Instead, I guide my practicum students to take a step back and decide what changes need to be made and why. I find myself stopping and rephrasing questions. I am still an impatient listener, and I still want to solve all of their problems, but I am now finally realizing that for the change to be long lasting and effective it has to come from within. And that is what I truly believe it means to cultivate a particular way of being. In order to effectively facilitate pre-service teachers’ pedagogical and professional growth, I have to also be willing to transform my own behavior. Though that is often hard to do, it is making me become more reflective of my practice which in turn will benefit those I mentor.